Slight update, i decided to install Aopen's own "handwritten" drivers, thinking maybe it's one of those crazy cards that doesn't work with reference drivers(hey, it was worth a shot!). Get this, the drivers on Aopen's site ARE the reference drivers, and not only that, it's the 45.23 version. Jesus, if they're going to be using the reference drivers the least they can do is keep them updated.
